Malaysian Invasion

Last weekend I took my first international trip since arriving in Thailand on May 8th. FINALLY!! I had been waiting for this moment for a long time. The Thai visa and work permit system is actually the most absurd thing I have ever had to deal with and until that was settled I was not permitted to travel outside of the country. Seriously though Thailand... you seem to make a whole big deal about making sure that your foreign teachers are legit YET somehow you manage to hire old disgusting ex-pats who are teaching Thai children that fish are not animals. Yup, that's correct. He said they were fish and that fish were not animals. When asked if he meant mammals he said no, animals, mammals are a group of animals. Hence, even when given the benefit of the doubt, he still failed. If we could vote people off of Thailand he would be my first choice.

Anyway, Malaysia. I had no idea what to expect going into this weekend. I had never really heard much about Malaysia and when I looked at pictures it seemed similar to Thailand but thankfully not the case at all. It is so much more developed and built up... and the people speak ENGLISH. Like, a lot, I might even say most, speak English. This obviously made it a lot easier to get around although their infrastructure is pretty advanced anyway so it would not have been too hard. We flew in late Friday night, got through customs, took a shuttle to Sentral Station in Kuala Lumpur and argued with a cab to take us to the hostel. 2am and a success.

the number of Malaysian flags on this cab is unreal

The next morning we got up at 7, ate breakfast, and were ready to go at 7:45 so that we could make it to the Patronus Towers (once the tallest buildings in the world, now the tallest set of 'twin towers' in the world... you will see later in this post more examples of how proud Malaysians are and how they need to qualify all of their attractions as being the 'biggest or best or largest or tallest'). Oops. 7:45 is already too late. We learned after talking to Susy (cute girl that ran the hostel... very helpful) that we really needed to have already left for the towers at 7am in order to make sure that we got tickets to get up to the top. The Patronus Towers are free to go up, however, they only let like 10 people up at a time for 15 minutes at a time during certain times of the day. If you want to go up them and to the sky bridge you have to arrive on sight at 7am, stand in line for 2 hours (they don't start giving out the tickets until almost 9am) and then try and figure out a time that you and your party can come back later that day. Getting there early enough means that you don't have a super awkward time like 11:30am or something where it is not enough time to go and do another activity really but like you don't want to wait around at the towers for 2 more hours waiting to go up. It's complicated, obviously, but really cool if you don't mind getting up early.

As a result we pushed back the PT visit until Sunday and went on our own walking tour of KL instead. We started off walking up through Chinatown, which unfortunately was not that poppin' yet since we had gotten up really early as we had planned on doing the towers. However, I did manage to buy a fake Longchamp that I have been wanting so success! Next we headed north to Masjid Jamek, one of the oldest and most beautiful mosques in KL. Unfortunately, due to Ramadan, the mosque was not open to visitors so we just got some pictures on the outside.

Next, we walked over to Dataran Merdeka (Independence Square) and gawked at the amount of Malaysian flags AND the TALLEST FLAG POLE IN THE WORLD. Are you seeming the theme? 2 stereotypes in one area. Ohhh Malaysia. Anyway, it was pretty cool and we got some great pictures there too!! Afterwards, we went south towards Masjid Negara (National Mosque) hoping that we would have a chance there to go into the mosque despite the holiday. SUCCESS!!

I was really excited to go into a mosque for the first time. I was not sure what to expect but wondered how it compared to a church. It very different. Basically, it is very plain and has a lot of open space because you are just supposed to pray and not be distracted by anything or anyone. Lots of floorspace for the crowds to kneel and pray to Allah in silence, no pictures of any people or living things in general (this is because you are not supposed to be examining or thinking about anything when you are praying, and lastly, no pictures of Allah! Muslims are very strict about this and teach children when they are very young never to try and draw a picture or even imagine what Allah could look like because he is unlike anything your mind could possibly fathom. It can be punishable by death to describe or even silently imagine what Allah could look like. The main room was circular and had some stained glass windows lining the wall to let in light (blue because calming) and the rest was white and some of it had a simple decorative design going around it. That's all. The women have to wear burkas (doesn't mine look fabulous?? PURPLE!!) and yeah, that's pretty much all I can remember. There was a Muslim woman there answering questions and giving a little history so that was interesting to hear. I would definitely go back to a mosque but I have to say that the churches of the world are a lot more ascetically pleasing. Whatever, I just wonder what Muslims do with all of their donation money since I feel that Christians tend to squander it on decorations. Maybe burka purchases for tourists. That sounds about right.

At this point we decided to go to the Lake Gardens to check out the Bird Park, Butterfly Farm, and Orchid and Hibiscus Gardens. We paid 45 ringit or almost 450 bhat to go into this Bird Park (which, by the way, is the WORLD'S LARGEST, WALK-IN, FREE FLIGHT AVERY). I'm telling you, if Malaysia were a person it would be the Jon Goselin of SE Asia. Doing all right on it's own, got the coolest thing on the block (Patronus Towers = 8 adorable kids and a hit TV show) then loses the title and just goes nuts trying to salvage any part of it's (mind you, newly made) identity. Insecure is the understatement of the century.

I hate birds. Like actually detest them. So dirty, they always fly at your face, make a lot of noise, and they poop on my balcony. Hate them. But Clinton and Martha Stewart had both visited the Bird Park so obviously it was a must-see ?!?!. Pretty cool birds. If you go and miss the bird show think of it as a blessing. It is definitely someplace I would never want to visit after the age of 8. Did i mention I hate birds?? Across the street were the hibiscus and orchid gardens so we checked those out and skipped the butterfly place. Thank god. Afterwards we headed alllll the way back up north by Masjid Jamek to have 'lunch' in Little India. It was 5pm. I was displeased about having lunch at early-bird special time but it was delicious so can't complain too much.

I was perfectly happy leaving both the KL and Patronus Towers until the next morning as Suzy had suggested but Lauren really had it in her head that she wanted to go that day so we went. It was definitely cool. In fact, I liked it a lot more than the Patronus Towers. You had to pay but got an audio with a whole tour of the city so that was pretty cool. We also got to see the Batu Caves in the distance, which gave us a good idea of where we would be heading Sunday afternoon. All and all a very good and jam-packed tourist day in KL.

That night we hit up the night scene. Knowing we had to get up at 6am to do the Towers we didn't go too crazy but got drinks at a few different bars and finally ended up at this Irish place and hung out with some French guys for the rest of the night. One of their names was Gale. Spelled Gael but still pronounced Gale, as in one of my elder relatives in Kansas. Obviously, I couldn't possibly take him seriously (still makes me giggle).

on the sky bridge at the Patronus Towers

The next day we got up early, did the Towers, got out by 10:30 and took bus 11 headed to the Batu Caves. The Batu Caves are one of the major Hindu retreats outside of India. It is basically hundreds of steep steps leading into a mountainside where crazy birds, rambunctious monkeys, and strict Hindus roam free. The caves were honestly one of my favorite sights of the trip. I do not know much about Hindu practices or rituals but the Indian people there were in traditional clothing and the infants had this muddy yellow stuff caked onto their little bald heads. I have asked a few people and am not sure exactly what it was for but interesting nonetheless. I do know that every year there is a particularly large gathering of Hindus there for some holiday and as part of the ritual the people hang heavy objects off their body piercings and proceed to climb up the mountainous steps into the caves. I can tell that's all the info I really know about it but TOTALLY worth checking out if you are heading to KL. Also, we took the train from the Caves back to Sentral Station (much better AND cheaper than going on the bus, do that).

That rounded off our adventures for the weekend. We finished the Batu Caves by 2pm and our flight was not until 9pm. I am still bitter that we rushed to do the KL Tower on Day 1 since we had nothing to do but hang out at a train station and airport for the next 7 hours but ah, mai pen rai. I had a huge smile on my face heading back to Thailand, home sweet home.